by Lucy | Jan 7, 2016 | biblical counseling, biblical counseling, identity in Christ, thoughts |
Can you guess the big lie Satan wants you to believe?
It’s NOT that you’re not good enough, though he tempts you to believe that one too. It’s NOT you’re unsuccessful or unattractive or a total mess-up or a waste of space, though you and I have fallen for some of these lesser lies, haven’t?
Can your believe I bought the lie that I was a defect?
This isn’t the big lie either. It destroyed my peace, though. God — through life-giving Bible truths and uplifting Christian music as well as counseling — showed me the truth: that I and every believer in Christ is his precious child and God also revealed the big lie at the core of my shame lie.
So what’s the big lie?
The Big Lie Is. .
The big lie Satan tempts you to believe is the same one Adam and Eve ate up in the Garden: God is holding back, that he couldn’t care less, that he’s not. . .good.
In this article, I’ll introduce you to the lying nature of Satan, then I’ll give you a strategy to overcome the big lie if you or someone you care about believes it. I learned much of this material while reading the Bible, Randy Alcorn’s book If God Is Good, and Billy Graham’s book Angels — all of which I highly recommend.
Genesis of the Big Lie
You probably know the fruit-chomping choice of Adam and Eve that caused sin to enter the world. You can read Genesis 3:1-6 (NIV) as dialogue here.
Satan: Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?”
Eve: We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, but God did say, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’
[FYI: Eve adds words to God’s commands. He did not command them not to touch the tree.]
Satan: You will not certainly die, for God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God,knowing good and evil.
When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.
God created Adam and Even without sin but they chose to rebel against him, just as the great archangel Lucifer (who became Satan) had chosen to rebel, and as you and I also choose the big lie over the beautiful truth of the gospel.
Lucifer’s Fall
Like all angels Lucifer was created good, for everything God created he called “very good” (Genesis 1:31). Yet at some point after the creation of the universe, some of the angels rebelled against God (Jude 6). Some scholars believe that Isaiah 14’s account of the demise of Babylon’s evil king may also describe Lucifer’s fate:
How you have fallen from heaven,
morning star, son of the dawn!…
You said in your heart,
“I will ascend to the heavens;
I will raise my throne
above the stars of God…
I will make myself like the Most High.”
But you are brought down to the realm of the dead,
to the depths of the pit.
This great, pride-filled, fallen angel is now called the devil, which means “slanderer,” and Satan (“the accuser”) as well as “a liar and the father of lies.” Jesus said in John 8:44:
You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.
Other revealing names of Satan’s true nature are described in Matthew 13:19, John 12:31, Revelation 12:10, among other Bible verses. The other fallen angels are now referred to as demons (Luke 8:30).
Strategy to Overcome the Big Lie
Now you know the lying nature of Satan, I want to the remind you of a crucial truth before revealing the strategy to overcome the big lie.
That is, God and Satan are NOT equals. This isn’t Batman versus the Joker.
Satan is a created being with limited power. He is not omniscient, omnipresent, or omnipotent, but he is intelligent and has been studying human behavior for thousands of years.
Here’s the strategy:
Tear down strongholds by recognizing them and replacing the lies with God’s truth.
Click & Tweet!
Easier said than done, I know. God can and will smash strongholds as use the weapons God has given you to overcome them.
Here’s the verse I shared in my last post and it’s worth re-sharing:
For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds. We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ. 2 Corinthians 10:4-5 (ESV)
Get This Truth Tool
To destroy the arguments and lofty opinions that are against God, you need to take every thought captive to obey Christ, just as the Apostle Paul said. I often share with my counselees — whom I meet with in person and by Skype all over the United States and the world — a valuable tool that helps them replace lies with truth. As counselees make this exchange, they experience a new way of thinking leading to peace-filled emotions and God-honoring behavior.
I want to give you this truth tool. See this post for the truth tool.
You can begin your path to the promise of the abundant life here and now.
This is the abundance of knowing God’s love for you and loving him and others. It’s better than the so-called abundance of a garage filled with BMWs, a house filled with flat screens, and a passport filled with stamps proving your worldwide travel.
If you want helping smashing the strongholds in your mind, please send me an email at Lucy@LucyAnnMoll.com and I’ll get you a downloadable version of the truth tool.
Sharing Hope with Your Heart,
by Lucy | Jul 14, 2015 | biblical counseling, thoughts |
Bad thoughts are negative and untrue thoughts that we speak to our souls. They are nasty, they are loud, and they self-condemn. These words that we say to ourselves may be silent to others, but between our own pierced ears, they slice and dice.
These bad thoughts may sound like:
“I’m not good enough.”
“Ugly. . .that’s me.”
“I’m so stupid.”
“Nobody cares about me.”
“I’m a horrible mom.”
“Loser.”
We women condemn ourselves many times a day, don’t we? You. Me. Everyone. Where did verbal bashing begin? How can we stop these bad thoughts?
Genesis of Verbal Bashing
Verbal-bashing began in the Garden. At first, everything was perfect, as you know. Adam and Eve romped in their God-ordained nudist colony for two without a worry. Then Satan in the form of a serpent slithered on the scene in Genesis 3 and spoke a lie to Eve. She didn’t blink. I would have screamed. Maybe. I don’t know.
His lie: “You shall not surely die. For God knows that when you eat of it [a tree that God had said was off-limits] your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”
She believed her enemy. She died. Not immediately, but eventually. Shame filled her. She and Adam sewed fig leaves to cover up. When I lie to myself, I am believing my enemy. You too. We all do it.
Two decades ago, an oft-told lie of mine: “You’re defective, Lucy.”
Thankfully, I finally listened to God while in a pit of despair and agreed with him that I am precious. I am precious because he says so. He created me “fearfully and wonderfully.” His words! FYI: “Fearfully” means “with great respect” in this context.
What lie do you tell yourself about yourself?
2 Steps to Stop Bad Thoughts
Here’s a way to stop bad thoughts. Two (not so) simple steps! Easy to say, much more difficult to put into practice, right?
1. Ask God to help you recognize the lies that you say to yourself.
2. Replace the lies with God’s truth.
In my example of “You’re defective, Lucy,” I replaced this lie with the biblical truth, “God says you are precious.” Every time I was tempted to speak the “you’re defective” lie to my soul, I then spoke the truth. Over time I self-condemned less often. At least this lie. I’m a work in progress, like you.
How can you begin to replace self-condemning bad thoughts with God’s truth?
by Lucy | Apr 2, 2013 | biblical counseling |
Abandonment hurts bad. The people who were supposed to love you pushed you away. They left, physically or emotionally or both. So now what?
Like bubble gum in hair, the hurt of abandonment sticks. Thank God it also awakens you to dream the highest dream: an authentic, life-giving relationship with Jesus, who lavishes you with love, teaches you that you matter, and comforts you.
Kc Hutter, author of her memoir A Broken Heart, knows abandonment. She lived it, this life of loss.
Let’s look at abandonment in this seventh post in the “Mending a Broken Heart” blog series. You can read the other posts (on divorce, a child’s death, addiction, and other tough stuff) here. You can learn more Kc’s book and buy it here.
Am I a Freak?
Women who’ve faced abandonment wonder if they are or ever will be normal.
The abandonment may be deep, like a dad who skips town and never returns, or is caused by another shattered dream: a friend moves away, a teenage son or daughter refuses your values, a trusted coworker gossips about you. You shrink. One-inch tall, that’s all.
Don’t feelings of rejection cut to your core? Haven’t you felt unwanted?
Click & Tweet!
Listen to Kc’s pain.
People often asked, ‘Why do you live with your uncle and aunt? Your folks, brothers, and sister live close, why not live at home?’
‘I don’t know,’ I answered. Wondering, am I a freak?
I heard stories: Dad wanted his sister, Louise, to raise a child but she could not get pregnant. Mother already had four children and couldn’t take care of the ones she had. Not enough food for the whole family.
Did my parents say, ‘We have four children, which one should we give away?’ Or maybe they made their choice using the flower petal rhyme, ‘She loves us. She loves us not. We love her. We love her not.’ As I imagined the petals falling, I realized I’d always wonder.
I was driven away by my aunt and uncle. Sitting alone in the back seat, I looked out the window, tapped the glass, and said good-bye. Tears dripped onto my little green, tin suitcase.
Kc was 2; her little brother, a newborn. There wasn’t room for all of them, toddler Kc was told. Her parents said it was for the best, this leaving, because her aunt wanted a little girl. When Kc moved out of the only home she knew, fear moved in.
Her little heart hurt. Badly.
Looking for Love
Kc looked to the heavens. Please Lord, I need to hear “I love you” out loud. I need someone’s arms to reach around and hold me.
Her aunt and uncle? Cold. They sometimes said mean things about her mom, that she never picked up baby Kc or changed her diapers.
Fast forward to high school graduation and marriage.
Within the year she’d marry her high school sweetheart, become pregnant, give birth to one baby then another. She promised God she’d give her little ones lots of hugs and kisses and say “I love you’s.” And she did.
Haven’t you made a decision you’d undo if you could because you ached for love?
Click & Tweet!
Kc’s husband, Delmer, traveled out of town week after week. The handsome bar owner poured her drink after drink and paid her the attention she craved. Delmer and Kc moved to another state then divorced, and soon she met Anthony. They became lovers and a year later, she and her sons (now teens) fled from her alcoholic, volatile live-in, fearing physical abuse.
She married again. Then she divorced. Always looking for love.
And then. . .she met her true Lover, Jesus, the one who’d never abandon her, or you. “God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you'” (Hebrews 13:5b). Later, Kc met her current husband, Jerry. They’ve been married nearly 30 years. Isn’t it reassuring you can heal?
How YOU Mend
As you read Kc’s story, didn’t you see a hint of your own? Abandonment is pervasive. Like mold in a shower, it blackens the grout until you submit to Christ’s will and he cleanses you from the inside out. This is key:
Christ gave his life for you in order to give his life to you so that he could live his live through you.
Click & Tweet!
Timothy Lane and Paul Trip in How People Change say:
Nothing is subtle about the ongoing war that rages throughout the Christian life. Trials and temptations about, but we respond to them from a new vantage point.
We can change our perspective of abandonment. Here are just three ideas.
1. Recognize that God blesses you. He is for you. You belong to him, and he wants you to experience the abundant life.
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. John 10:10.
2. Determine to want what God wants: a loving relationship with Jesus. Let go of lesser pleasures that entice. Seek the greatest pleasure and spend your life enjoying God.
So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness. Colossians 2:6-7
3. Embrace the truth that God uses the pain of trials, including abandonment, to increase your desire for the highest dream.
In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 1 Peter 1:6-7.
Isn’t it wonderful to know that you belong to God? That you can spend the rest of your life enjoying him? That your pain has a goal: to take on the character of God!
An Invitation
Friends, we gave one hope: Christ. In him we have everything we need to live a fruitful and godly life now. Wouldn’t it be awesome to have this? If you’re in a trial and would like biblical counsel to grow and change, I invite you to consider biblical counseling.
I’m a biblical counselor, certified by the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors and by the Association of Biblical Counselors. I also am a graduated of Western Seminary, Portland, OR in Pastoral Care to Women, and am working toward a doctorate in Biblical Counseling.
I meet with counselees (women, teen girls, and couples) in person and by Skype.
May our great God bless you, as I know he will. Ephesians 1:3
Sharing Hope for Your Heart,
by Lucy | Dec 6, 2012 | emotions |
Secrets hold you back from experiencing God’s grace. Are you willing to tell him your pain? He promises to shower you with love and compassion.
God woke me up and said it was time.
Time to let my secrets out. My tears spoke my pain. My husband asked me what was wrong. Could I tell him?
I’m scared, God, so terribly afraid. I’ve kept my secrets safe for so long.
Secrets of shame. Shame hurts. Bad, real bad.
I felt shattered, like a million pieces of glass. My tears unceasing. Help me, God, I am broken and disintegrating.
This pain I forgot I had, this pain I had poured down down down a drain. Now it bubbles up and threatens to swoosh me away. It feels too much for an ocean.
Yet a drop in the hands of our Comforter.
My Pain, Your Pain?
Have you had a similar experience? Out of the blue you felt an intense emotion — anger, sadness, grief — out of proportion with what happened?
For me it began with a 911 call that I made on behalf of my soon-to-be-divorced dad, who had fallen and hit his head. His estranged wife called me and informed me of the fall and then hightailed to work. The EMTs zoomed to my dad’s home, checked him, and left. I had feared a stroke, but he was OKAY.
I wasn’t.
Two weeks later after the phone call, I awoke to the fiercest emotional pain I’ve ever experienced. Ever.
I don’t wish this pain on anyone. Tears, confusion, dark memories, tears.
Now, nearly two decades later, it am thankful God said it was time to let out my secret.
He knew it was time to heal my shame. I am healed of the pain that had shackled me. Praise God.
But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin. 1 John 1:7
Question: Have you sensed God’s desire for your healing? How did you sense it? Please take a moment to share. Thank you.
With Joy Overflowing!
by Lucy | Jul 14, 2011 | emotions
When fear hits, you can run away from it or fight it. Here are three godly steps to defeat fear. . .and find the peace you need.
The serpent eyed Eve and strung together lies.
Did the woman run? Or yell, “Help me, Adam”? You know the infamous story. Eve and the serpent chatted up a storm that crashed into her world. . .and yours. Fear debuted for the very first time in history. It grabbed center stage.
The Faces of Fear
Fear. It’s a quirky emotion. It protects. Example: A pitbull charges you, and your feet hurdle a fence like a world‐class Olympian. Safe, you breathe relief. Fear also shows its scary sides. It may stalk you, steal your peace, and imprison you. This is bad fear. The type that tempts you to make an ugly choice (aka: sin).
At the core of bad fear is shame. Shame whispers lies: “You’re inherently worthless and defective. You’re junk.”
Many believers in Jesus Christ hear shame, too. Some of us grew up in homes where we were told through word or action that we “should never have been born.” Others endured abuse or witnessed it. Example: Dad swore at Mom and slammed her against a door while you and your siblings cowered.
Shames entices you and me to to hide, to cover up, to strategically place fig leaves over the pain. In childhood or adulthood it may pop up as depression, addiction (including being super busy at church), self-condemnation, unforgiveness, and panic attacks. This is the short list.
Turning Fear to Faith: 3 Steps
Trouble by fear? Try these steps. Repeat them as often as fear tempts you. Consider speaking your pastor or a faith-based counselor.
1. Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal the answer to this question: What am I hiding? Chances are, he’ll pinpoint areas of pain generated from fear. Example: You feel hurt that your loved one forgot to call you, and you fear rejection even though God says he’ll never leave you.
2. Do a U-Turn. Repent (or a 180-degree turn) of your sins including ungodly responses to fear. Ask God for help. He will help you.
3. Replace fear with faithful choices. Let’s say that you are afraid to confront a co-worker who is misrepresenting you to your supervisor OR the woman who talks about you behind your back. Choose to follow God’s instructions in the Bible, and go to her and speak to her privately, lovingly and truthfully.
Yes, this is easier said than done. Be encouraged. God gives you the strength to obey him.
You are not alone.
You Are Blessed,
