The old saying is true, People don’t care how much you know till they know how much you care.

Trust. This matters. If you don’t care, no one will trust you.

Seriously. Why would you? or me? Why would we trust someone whom we don’t know and get hurt again?

Like the Caddyshack gopher — yep, the one with the dance moves and destructo mindset — I dig a hole, hide in the dark, popping up only when I determine it’s safe.

WHAT IF SAFE IS, like, NEVER?

This is a cry of so many women: Keep me safe, hold me, make the scary stuff go away.

Because I’m scared

and if people only heard my thought or knew the real me

they would run

scream

flee in the other direction.

I used to be one of the scared, of the untrusting.

Now, I don’t hang out my dirty underwear for all to see but, hey, if my slip is showing, so what. Really, who cares?

In my scared, untrusting days, confiding in someone — even God — would unnerve me. More than that, it would send me running.

To. My. Dark. Hole.

One sunny morning, the hole became so dark, it caved in. I had to reach out or die. A slow death of losing myself.

Then I forgot myself, looked to Jesus and found myself in him.

This marked the day I decided to drag myself out of depression. I couldn’t do it alone. I needed God, my family and a counselor. I needed to take a chance and trust.

Not easy. It took time.

Lots of time.

This is the nature of trust. Built over time, trust can bridge the fear of being found out.

So what it my slip is showing.

You Are Loved, Lucy

P.S. Watch this and smile: The Caddyshack gopher and a Tiger. Enjoy.

P.S.S. Do you struggle with depression? Check out Real Hope Biblical eCounseling. There’s hope.