by Lucy | Jul 26, 2016 | biblical counseling, emotions, thoughts
YOUR EMOTIONS tell you a lot about your thoughts. Guess where your thoughts originate? Your thoughts come from your deeply held beliefs! When your beliefs line up with God’s Word, you experience a transformed life
You feel what you feel because you think what you think.
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What does this have to do with a transformed life? More than you might imagine. Your thoughts are the key to transformation.
In the short article, you’ll discover:
- Emotions “talk.”
- Change your thoughts, and you’ll change your emotions.
- Experiencing life transformation.
Emotions Say Something Important
Emotions “talk.” They reveal thoughts. When you know what you’re thinking you can ask yourself, Do my thoughts agree with God’s Word.
To see how this works, “hear” the thoughts in this parable where the rich man feels the emotion of fear of loss.
And he (Jesus) told them a parable, saying, “The land of a rich man produced plentifully, and he thought to himself, ‘What shall I do, for I have nowhere to store my crops?’
And he said, ‘I will do this: I will tear down my barns and build larger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods. And I will say to my soul, “Soul, you have ample goods laid up for many years; relax, eat, drink, be merry.”’
But God said to him, ‘Fool! This night your soul is required of you, and the things you have prepared, whose will they be?’ So is the one who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God.” (Luke 12:16-21, ESV)
In the parable, the rich man thought he’d have his crops a long time and told himself to relax, eat, drink, and be merry (actions). His thoughts and actions were based on the godless belief that pleasure is what matters, not God. His fearful emotion was an early signal to pay attention to his thoughts and change them as necessary.
What is one of your common thoughts?
- Life’s not fair?
- I’m a loser/ugly/stupid?
- If I had more money/status/popularity, then I’d be happy?
Ask yourself, Does my thought agree with Scripture?
Change Your Thoughts and Emotions Change
Years ago I counseled a Christian woman I’ll call Anna, who was sexually abused by a family friend at age 13. This family friend led a Christian camp, contributing to her twisted image of God. To her God was weak and uncaring, even evil.
She thought sex was a way to get what she wanted most: affection and love. She settled for the false love of naked embraces and murmured “I love you”s” from high school boys.
Above all else, guard your heart,
for everything you do flows from it. Proverbs 4:23, NIV
In time, Anna discovered that only God fulfills her deep need for true love. Her emotions changed from fear and sadness to peace and contentment. Her beliefs changed too as she believed God’s Word and applied its truths to her life.
Experience Life Transformation
Believing the Word of God is crucial to thinking in line with God’s thoughts. As you believe God and spend time reading and meditating on Bible verses, God renews your mind. He transforms your life. Check out Romans 12:2.
“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”
As God transforms your thinking, your actions change too.
- You thank God for your home rather than complaining about your old furniture.
- You pray more often because you want to draw near to God.
- You replace the habit of spending hours on Facebook with spending time with your kids.
As you take your eyes off your emotions and as your thoughts change, guess what happens? You begin to experience inner contentment, joy, hope, and peace. Who doesn’t want the abundant life?
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. John 10:10, ESV
Sharing Hope with Your Heart,
by Lucy | Jun 16, 2016 | biblical counseling |
Jesus is in every book of the Bible! Take this music journey through the 66 books of the Bible and discover who Jesus is.
Here’s the link to the song. If you don’t have time to listen, drink in the lyrics below. Your heart will fill with the beauty of Jesus in you, for He Is!
“He Is” by Aaron Jeoffrey
In Genesis, He’s the breath of life
In Exodus, the Passover Lamb
In Leviticus, He’s our High Priest
Numbers, The fire by night
Deuteronomy, He’s Moses’ voice
In Joshua, He is salvation’s choice
Judges, law giver
In Ruth, the kinsmen-redeemer
First and second Samuel, our trusted prophet
In Kings and Chronicles, He’s sovereign
Ezra, true and faithful scribe
Nehemiah, He’s the rebuilder of broken walls and lives
In Esther, He’s Mordecai’s courage
In Job, the timeless redeemer
In Psalms, He is our morning song
In Proverbs, wisdom’s cry
Ecclesiastes, the time and season
In the Song of Solomon, He is the lover’s dream
He is, He is, HE IS!
In Isaiah, He’s Prince of Peace
Jeremiah, the weeping prophet
In Lamentations, the cry for Israel
Ezekiel, He’s the call from sin
In Daniel, the stranger in the fire
In Hosea, He is forever faithful
In Joel, He’s the Spirits power
In Amos, the arms that carry us
In Obadiah, He’s the Lord our Savior
In Jonah, He’s the great missionary
In Micah, the promise of peace
In Nahum, He is our strength and our shield
In Habakkuk and Zephaniah, He’s pleading for revival
In Haggai, He restores a lost heritage
In Zechariah, our fountain
In Malachi, He is the son of righteousness rising with healing in His wings
He is, He is, HE IS!
In Matthew, Mark, Luke and John, He is God, Man, Messiah
In the book of Acts, He is fire from heaven
In Romans, He’s the grace of God
In Corinthians, the power of love
In Galatians, He is freedom from the curse of sin
Ephesians, our glorious treasure
Philippians, the servants heart
In Colossians, He’s the Godhead Trinity
Thessalonians, our coming King
In Timothy, Titus, Philemon He’s our mediator and our faithful Pastor
In Hebrews, the everlasting covenant
In James, the one who heals the sick.
In First and Second Peter, he is our Shepherd
In John and in Jude, He is the lover coming for His bride
In the Revelation, He is King of Kings and Lord of Lords
He is, He is, HE IS!
The prince of peace
The Son of man
The Lamb of God
The great I AM
He’s the alpha and omega
Our God and our Savior
He is Jesus Christ the Lord
and when time is no more
He is, HE IS!
If you haven’t yet subscribed to this blog, please do. Dare to belief the truth that in Jesus you have everything you need.
Believes God is who He says He is!
Sharing hope with your heart,
by Lucy | Feb 4, 2016 | emotions, emotions, thoughts |
Isn’t it encouraging that you and God can rewrite old tapes that are negative and discouraging?
These tapes, these words you repeat to yourself, may have a tidbit of truth.
An example:
You may have made a mistake–we all do–but your mistake doesn’t define you.
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To God, you are not a failure.
The old tapes you play may say you you’re a mess-up or lack value or beauty. The most important and wonderful truth: In Christ, you are God’s child and he loves you beyond your imagination.
He loves you, so you can share love with others. . .family, friends, people at church, neighbors, co-workers, the cashier at Walmart, anyone, everyone.
We love because he first loved us. 1 John 4:19, ESV
Tapes Start in Childhood
The old destructive tapes often began in childhood. An exception may be that you married an abusive man who puts you down day after day after day. He may tell you that you’re stupid and a loser. Even with a great childhood, hearing this vitriol in your marriage can undo you and cause you to question your worth.
In childhood, did your dad say or insinuated that you’d amount to nothing or that you were a bother? Did he make unwelcome comments about your looks or women’s beauty (or lack there of)? Did your mom seem preoccupied or highly critical? Did she have her nose in a book or her eyes fixed on TV, and shooed you away when you wanted her attention? Did she give you the silent treatment or yell at you when you failed in her eyes?
If this happened to you, my heart hurts for you. This isn’t the childhood God wants parents to to their children. You can get a picture of God’s plan for parenting here and here and here.
The messages you believed in childhood morphed into tapes that we adults repeat to ourselves regularly, if not daily,
and especially when stressed.
Overcoming the Discouragement of Old Tapes
God loves you so much he wants you to rewrite the tapes from childhood and end the sinful habits you learned from them. You may have tried to overcome your sinful habits–whether worry, bitterness, or laziness–through prayer, Bible study, talking with trustworthy friends, and even counseling. Still, they may plague you.
These sinful habits have lodged in your heart. From the heart flows our thoughts (Proverbs 4:23).
What you believe about yourself and God–whether true or false–becomes part of your thinking, but you can change!
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When negative thoughts pop us, they may seem to come out of nowhere. It’s as if they have a life of their own. When plagued with negative thoughts, isn’t it easy to feel helpless?
You may be tempted to give up on changing them. As a Christ-follower, you know God wants to thinks thoughts pleasing to him. Doesn’t Philippians 4:8 say. . .?
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
There is hope!
Rewriting Old Tapes Is a Process
You can rewrite the old tapes that began in childhood. This won’t happen overnight; it’s a process. As you replace lies you believe with God’s truth–wonderful changes ensue:
- Your thought patterns improve.
- Your beliefs line up more and more with the Word of God.
- You begin to desire what God desires–that his will be done.
Take delight in the Lord,
and he will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4, NIV
Most important, your life glorifies God. Isn’t this the real reason God created us?
As you meditate on scripture, you create new tapes, encouraging and godly and life-giving tapes. These new tapes replace the old ones. and your thoughts, emotions, and actions follow suit. Your heart is revived!
“Heart” is the biblical term for your beliefs and motivations from which your thoughts, emotions, and actions flow. When the Bible speaks of the heart, it is almost exclusively refers to the inner workings of the soul and mind. It is the immaterial part of your being.
At first change may seem slow. As you continue to internalize the God’s truths, the greater and faster these changes will be!
Awful thoughts and sinful habits that plague you will lessen, even disappear. You’ll feel joy–and dare I say, true happiness.
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Your Next Step
Look up the Bible verses listed below. Memorize them one at a time and meditate on them.
Some of my counselees like to write them on index cards or sticky notes and place them on their car dashboard or bathroom mirror to reread them often. Others like to “draw” the verses, using the words with sketches.
Romans 12:1-2
Ephesians 4:22-24
2 Peter 1:3-4
Soon you’ll have new tapes because your mind cannot have both sinful and righteous thoughts at the same time. Tell me how it goes. I love hearing from my readers!
OFFER: I offer a complimentary 15-minute, phone consultation with any woman who has questions about counseling. To take advantage of this offer, simply contact me and say “I’d like a consultation.” I’ll email you and we’ll set up a time to talk on the phone.
Sharing Hope with Your Heart!
by Lucy | Jan 7, 2016 | biblical counseling, biblical counseling, identity in Christ, thoughts |
Can you guess the big lie Satan wants you to believe?
It’s NOT that you’re not good enough, though he tempts you to believe that one too. It’s NOT you’re unsuccessful or unattractive or a total mess-up or a waste of space, though you and I have fallen for some of these lesser lies, haven’t?
Can your believe I bought the lie that I was a defect?
This isn’t the big lie either. It destroyed my peace, though. God — through life-giving Bible truths and uplifting Christian music as well as counseling — showed me the truth: that I and every believer in Christ is his precious child and God also revealed the big lie at the core of my shame lie.
So what’s the big lie?
The Big Lie Is. .
The big lie Satan tempts you to believe is the same one Adam and Eve ate up in the Garden: God is holding back, that he couldn’t care less, that he’s not. . .good.
In this article, I’ll introduce you to the lying nature of Satan, then I’ll give you a strategy to overcome the big lie if you or someone you care about believes it. I learned much of this material while reading the Bible, Randy Alcorn’s book If God Is Good, and Billy Graham’s book Angels — all of which I highly recommend.
Genesis of the Big Lie
You probably know the fruit-chomping choice of Adam and Eve that caused sin to enter the world. You can read Genesis 3:1-6 (NIV) as dialogue here.
Satan: Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?”
Eve: We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, but God did say, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’
[FYI: Eve adds words to God’s commands. He did not command them not to touch the tree.]
Satan: You will not certainly die, for God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God,knowing good and evil.
When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.
God created Adam and Even without sin but they chose to rebel against him, just as the great archangel Lucifer (who became Satan) had chosen to rebel, and as you and I also choose the big lie over the beautiful truth of the gospel.
Lucifer’s Fall
Like all angels Lucifer was created good, for everything God created he called “very good” (Genesis 1:31). Yet at some point after the creation of the universe, some of the angels rebelled against God (Jude 6). Some scholars believe that Isaiah 14’s account of the demise of Babylon’s evil king may also describe Lucifer’s fate:
How you have fallen from heaven,
morning star, son of the dawn!…
You said in your heart,
“I will ascend to the heavens;
I will raise my throne
above the stars of God…
I will make myself like the Most High.”
But you are brought down to the realm of the dead,
to the depths of the pit.
This great, pride-filled, fallen angel is now called the devil, which means “slanderer,” and Satan (“the accuser”) as well as “a liar and the father of lies.” Jesus said in John 8:44:
You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.
Other revealing names of Satan’s true nature are described in Matthew 13:19, John 12:31, Revelation 12:10, among other Bible verses. The other fallen angels are now referred to as demons (Luke 8:30).
Strategy to Overcome the Big Lie
Now you know the lying nature of Satan, I want to the remind you of a crucial truth before revealing the strategy to overcome the big lie.
That is, God and Satan are NOT equals. This isn’t Batman versus the Joker.
Satan is a created being with limited power. He is not omniscient, omnipresent, or omnipotent, but he is intelligent and has been studying human behavior for thousands of years.
Here’s the strategy:
Tear down strongholds by recognizing them and replacing the lies with God’s truth.
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Easier said than done, I know. God can and will smash strongholds as use the weapons God has given you to overcome them.
Here’s the verse I shared in my last post and it’s worth re-sharing:
For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds. We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ. 2 Corinthians 10:4-5 (ESV)
Get This Truth Tool
To destroy the arguments and lofty opinions that are against God, you need to take every thought captive to obey Christ, just as the Apostle Paul said. I often share with my counselees — whom I meet with in person and by Skype all over the United States and the world — a valuable tool that helps them replace lies with truth. As counselees make this exchange, they experience a new way of thinking leading to peace-filled emotions and God-honoring behavior.
I want to give you this truth tool. See this post for the truth tool.
You can begin your path to the promise of the abundant life here and now.
This is the abundance of knowing God’s love for you and loving him and others. It’s better than the so-called abundance of a garage filled with BMWs, a house filled with flat screens, and a passport filled with stamps proving your worldwide travel.
If you want helping smashing the strongholds in your mind, please send me an email at Lucy@LucyAnnMoll.com and I’ll get you a downloadable version of the truth tool.
Sharing Hope with Your Heart,
by Lucy | Dec 8, 2015 | biblical counseling, emotions, identity in Christ, whole health wellness
Did you know that among the best ways to stop bad eating habits is to stop telling yourself lies?
Sure, you may weigh a few pounds more than you’d like. Or a lot more. You may even be underweight!
But are you self-sabotaging by telling yourself speaking lies to yourself?
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Kelly tells herself things like, “You’re fat. You’re ugly. What a loser.” She’s anxious about the holidays, afraid she’ll be tempted by cookies, give in to her bad eating habits, and feel horrible about herself A part of her doesn’t want to attend her office party, even her family gathering.
These thoughts lead to more negative thinking: “I’ll be all alone. No one will miss me. No one cares.” Do you fear you may overeat and feel like a total screw-up? That you’ll never succeed over emotional eating? There’s hope.
What Is Emotional Eating?
To have victory over bad eating habits, you’ll need to break the cycle of emotional eating. Emotional eating is turning to food to feel better. The problem is, you end up feeling worse and eat more. Or eat nothing.
When Cara mothered three cute preschoolers, she sometimes baked a cake for dessert to serve after dinner. While the little ones snuggled for a post-lunch nap, she sliced a wedge of cake for a snack and ate it. Feeling guilty and fearing her husband would find out, and even call her names, she bake a second cake. What happened to the first cake?
She gobbled at least half and smashed the rest in the trash. Worse than her stomachache, she lost self-respect. The lies, the deception, the realization that she needed help to overcome emotional eating–all these weight on her.
Did you know you can stop bad eating habits when you begin desiring what God desires? He desires that you love him above all else. He desires your heart. In the Bible, the heart refers to your inner control center of your motivations, beliefs, thoughts, emotions and actions.
As in water face reflects face,
So a man’s heart reveals the man. Proverbs 27:19
God’s life-changing power helps you embrace a right perspective of food, make good and godly food choices, straighten out your thinking on food, and be successful. A great resource for those times you mess up — and we all mess up sometimes — is Love to Eat, Hate to Eat by biblical counselor Elyse Fitzpatrick.
Choosing the Truth
You know God wants you to live life based on truth, not emotions.
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The truth of who he is. The truth of who you are. His truth is sure.
Our emotions go up and down like an elevator. Now emotions are fine; God gave them to us. But you must not trust them to influence your decisions. You need to choose truth.
Back in college I survived on wheat thins, pizza, and Diet Coke. Bad eating habits and lies.
My weight was fine. But my pizza bloat prompted nasty thoughts—you fatso, you idiot, you idiotic fatso—and sometimes a stop by the women’s dorm bathroom, where I pressed my fingers to the back of my throat, hoping to throw up.
1. Recognizing Lies You Repeat
Identifying the lies you say to yourself isn’t as easy as it may sound. If you’ve made a habit of repeating the lies to yourself, they may appear truthful.
Don’t be duped. Line up what you say to yourself with God’s truth. A helpful Bible verse:
Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things. (Philippians 4:8, NIV)
Let’s take a common lie many women struggle with: “I’m ugly.”
Ask yourself, Is this true according to God? Really think about it. Would God say, “You are ugly”? Down deep you know he’d never say this because God is love and all his works are wonderful. Including you.
2. Identify Your Triggers
Pay attention to the times and places and situations that trigger emotional eating.
Kelly’s triggers: Any sort of rejection as well as certain childhood memories.
Cara’s triggers: Loneliness and a difficult marriage.
Mine: A desire for other’s approval.
All of these triggers are based on the lie that God doesn’t care. The truth is you are created in the image of God (Genesis 1:27), which has been marred by sin and the fall (Romans 5:19), is being restored in the life of believers of Jesus Christ (Ephesians 4:24). The cross proves God cares.
While holding tight to this truth, it’s wise to avoid places and situations that trigger emotional eating. For instance, if tempted to buy a bag of chips at a certain convenience store on your way home from work, you could either drive another street or repeat a helpful verse to remind yourself of the truth of God’s power and care. One helpful to me is 2 Peter 1:3:
His divine power has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who has called us by His own glory and excellence.
This verse reminded me that I didn’t need to search around for a secret solution. I already had everything I needed to face temptation and triggers. What has helped you triumph over your triggers to emotional eating? If your triggers are plaguing you, what’s one action you can take today to help?
3. Replace Destructive Self-Talk with Truth-Telling
I’ve discussed how to do this in this popular post. In short, you write down truth that counter the lies you identified in step 1 above. You keep telling yourself the truth each time your self-talk goes south. Within a few weeks, you’ll make a huge dent in the habit of destructive self-talk.
My counselees have found journaling in a certain method I teach to be exceeding helpful. I’d love to show you. Just ask for by complimentary journal template.
Just for YOU!
Did you know I counsel women by Skype all over the world and in person in the greater Chicago area? Click here to find out more about my no-cost consultation by phone. Or simply read about how I counsel compassionately and effectively through God’s unparalleled word.
Feel free to contact me with your questions. I try to answer each one I receive.
Counseling Hope to Your Heart,
