With self care, a woman flourishes. Yet we women often stumble into a dangerous trap: self neglect.
A while back, I counseled a woman who felll into self-neglect after months of caring for ill relatives, one after another. She ran their errands, took them to the doctor, cooked and cleaned and cared for them. Then she hit extreme exhaustion that brought of depression. Her adult son cared for her!
When you neglect yourself, it’s tough to be the mom-friend-worker-wife God desires. You may become anxious, angry, moody, and self-absorbed. You may also become physically and spiritually weak. Self care is taking care of yourself emotionally, physically, intellectually, and spiritually. It is whole health wellness.
In this short article, you’ll discover:
- Self care is not selfish.
- 7 signs of self-neglect.
Self Care Is NOT Selfishness
There’s a Grand Canyon-sized difference between selfishness and self care.
As mentioned, self care is taking care of your emotional, physical, intellectual, and spiritual needs with a heart motivation of loving God and loving others. Wouldn’t you agree healthy self care is good since your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit?
Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. 1 Corinthians 6: 19-20, ESV
On the flip side, selfishness is putting yourself above everyone else. Your needs, your wants, your everything prevails. This is neither healthy nor caring.
Jesus prioritized the most important attitudes and actions:
Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and love your neighbor as yourself. Luke 10:25-28, NIV
7 Signs of Self Neglect
Neglecting self care may signal a need to show greater care of the temple of the Holy Spirit, and in turn, God. Are any of these true of you?
1. You want to lose excess weight.
2. You have fatigue because you lack sleep and exercise.
3. Your emotions are frazzled.
4. You lack laughter.
5. You spend little meaningful time with friends in real life.
6. Your financial budget spells stress stress and more stress.
7. You think God doesn’t love you or care or is too busy elsewhere.
If you’ve gotten off track, you can choose self care out of love for God. You can lose weight, get great sleep, start walking, have better emotions, laugh again, spend time with friends, get financial peace, and know that God loves you.
God promises to change your heart. Why not choose selfless self-care?
Just for You
Downl
oad: Get this New Priorities and Planning download.
Counseling: Would you like biblical help in making better choices–emotional or spiritual? Contact me and we’ll set up a time to talk in person or by Skype.
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Sharing Hope with Your Heart,
I am excited for this series. I am looking for advice for single parents in the area of self care. I am a single mom of 3. Truthfully, there is not much time for me. My support system is small and sometimes unable to help much with anything. Thanks for posting this series.
Hi there! Thanks for sharing your struggle. It is hard being a single mom. So much responsiblity, so little time. We will be talking about friendships and support systems in an upcoming post. Be sure to stop by my Facebook page too. I put up a question on your one of your greatest needs in caring for yourself. Love and blessings, Lucy
Love your neighbor as yourself.
We can’t love others until we love ourselves and if we’re not practicing self-care then we aren’t loving ourselves.
Thank you for this series. I’m eagerly looking forward to the next posting.
Yep. When we practice super self care, then we take care of the temple in which the Holy Spirit dwells each believer in the Lord Jesus Christ. God wants us to love him and to love others most of all. Love and blessings, Lucy
Sounds like a great 8 weeks. Thank you!
Glad to have you join us, Heidi. It’s going to be a great eight weeks. <3
I just found your blog. I’m looking forward to this series. We have a LOT of issues in our marriage: I’m spiritually single, he’s addicted to gambling, I have SGA, we have sex issues, etc etc. I am 46 and JUST NOW starting to learn how to be me and take care of myself.
It’s tough to be in a lonely marriage. This is not God’s design. God wants you and your husband to be united. I will pray for you. You mention SGA; what is this? Blessings, Lucy
Thanks Lucy. SGA is same gender attraction. My sexual orientation is towards women. But I have not done anything/acted on it since before we got married. One of my main support people
in my life says “God does not want us to be heterosexual, he wants us to be holy”.
…Lisa
I think I am guilty of leaving off the last part of the verse where God tells us to love our neighbor as ourselves! I believe this series is going to be very good for me!
Barbara, the verse presupposes we have love for ourselves. No problem there. 🙂 Yet God wants us to take care of ourselves for His glory. What do you think?
The pic is soooo beautiful! By the way your article is very interesting! Compliment and continue on this way!