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Mama Needs a Time Out

By on May 7, 2013 in healing resources, Mama Needs a Break

I asked a few hundred women in a Facebook group this Q: What is your top mama need?

Three kept popping up:  A support system of family and friends, time alone, and encouragement.

Psst: If yours isn’t listed, please send me a contact message and I’ll address yours in a blog post or give you an answer by email.  :-)

Also please leave a comment! Comments give encouragement to me and others. :-)

Scroll to the very, very, very bottom of this post and type your comment. Thanks!  

Today let’s look at the whys and the hows of taking a timeout. Ready? I am. . .’cause this mama needs a break!

What a Time Out Is NOT

When a mama takes a time out, she is not beating herself up.

I need to do more. I’m a bad mom. The laundry’s flowing over baskets. Err, this counter is sticky, this floor is stick, I’m sticky. I suck.

In your time out you do NOT start planning. Hey, if I’m taking a time out, I might as well get busy planning my day, my week, my month, my life. NO! Do NOT go here.

You do NOT rehearse “what if’s.” What if I were thinner or toner or smarter or organized?

 Do you beat yourself up sometimes, thinking you should do more or do different? Isn’t this a recipe for anxiety? 

What a Time Out Is!

A time out is a time to rest. Sure, take a nap if you need one. But here I am focusing on resting the mind, bathing the Spirit in Jesus’ invitation. You know it, don’t you?

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. Matthew 11:28-29

These are power words, this time out invitation. Disconnecting with worry and busyiness. Connect with the One who loves you best. Amen.

Among the women I counsel biblically, I register not only a lack of soul rest but also iffy self care. Easy to remedy self care. Here are the three most important:

1. Drink water, about 6 to 8 8-ounces a day. Water has many healing properties. I’ll write a post soon on the spiritual and emotional healing properties of water. Incidentally, soda pop is not water.

2. Get enough sleep, about 7 to 10 hours daily. Set a time to get ready for bed and a time to wake up. Again, there are spiritual and emotional health benefits to sleep.

3. Move. You don’t have to join a gym or sign up for Zumba. Just move. Walks are perfect. Stretch. Breath deep from the belly.

What’s Next

When you read a post suggesting change, you make feel overwhelmed. Change is hard. You may feel defeated or think, “I tried that before and I quit after three days, so why bother?”

Why bother?

Take a time out to refresh and regroup because you matter, you are valuable, you are significant. Your children (toddlers or married adults) are watching how you take care of yourself and spend your time. God rested, didn’t he?

Take a time out and rest in Jesus. Go to him. He’s waiting. Find rest for your soul.

Coming up in the “Mama Needs a Break” series: Your Next Big Thing!

photo credit: Myxi via photopin cc

Blessings and Hope!

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Guess Why I Hate the Super Bowl

By on January 31, 2013 in emotions, healing resources, hope

I hate the Super Bowl.

I love football. Cheered the Irish alongside my dad on Saturdays. Now I tweet Bears on Sundays.

What’s the disconnect?

Any big event – including the Super Bowl in New Orleans on February 3 – is big business for traffickers of sex slavery.

The traffickers bus in the girls and women and boys on Super Bowl weekend.

The johns pay to indulge in sexual pleasure. They don’t care about the girls. Just themselves.

The slave owners pocket the money, lots of money: $9.5 billion throughout the world each year for sex slavery, according to Born to Fly citing the FBI. Human trafficking (all types, including forced labor) ranks #2 among all income-generating syndicates. Illegal drugs are #1; illegal arms are #3.

The average of sex slaves around the world is 11 years old.

Are You Angry?

Me too. Here’s a link to a brief video. It’ll get you real mad. Righteous anger! Warning: It’s disturbing.

What should you do with your anger? That’s the big question, a hopeful question.

You can make a difference. You can help end slavery.

Occasionally I’m awakened by a dream in which I’m the female version of Chuck Norris, karate chop my way into a brothel of  sex slaves, and lead them to freedom.

But dreams won’t stop slavery at the Super Bowl. Action will. You can do more to end slavery than you might think.

How You Make a Difference

First. pray. Pray for the johns, the slaves, the traffickers, and the authorities. Pray how the Holy Spirit leads you.

Second, become aware. More and more websites and organizations are involved in stopping sex slavery through prevention, rescue, and aftercare. A few great ones are: Free the Slaves, Born to Fly, The Exodus Road, and International Justice Mission.

Third, decide how you’ll make a difference. A few ideas:

  • Financially support groups that fight sex slavery.
  • Discuss the book God in a Brothel (endorsed by many Christian leaders) in your Sunday school class or small group.
  • Blog about sex slavery. The Exodus Road has a team of bloggers you might consider joining. Of course you can blog on your own.
  • Involve your church’s youth group in a fundraiser to support organizations that prevent, rescue, and/or provide aftercare to sex slaves.
  • Purchase a Save the Girls tee. I had these designed by a professional graphic artist to help spread the word about trafficking . I give 50 percent of the proceeds to Born to Fly, which helps prevent child slavery before it happens. Available sizes: M, L, XL. Only $12. Contact me to order. Ships within 36 hours. Here’s the graphic on the tee:

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Remember, you can change your world because Christ has changed you.

Let’s start by praying during the Super Bowl. Are you game?

photo credit: furanda via photopin cc

 

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Hopefully Yours,

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God, Heal My Unbelief

By on January 17, 2013 in biblical counseling, emotions, faith

The biggest struggle of Christians is unbelief.

Yes, we Christians are born again and attend church and pray and read the Bible.

But. . .

in day-to-day living — between paying bills, helping with homework, and finding time to laugh — we Christians doubt God more than we care to admit.

Did God really say we can cast our cares on him? If I believed him, why this worry? Was he joking about consider it joy when you face trials of many kinds? If I believed him, why do I balk when life goes awry?

Thank God there’s hope for us.

“If You Can?”

Without confidence in God, it is impossible to worship unless, of course, I am asking our God to strengthen my belief like the father described in the Gospel of Mark.

Do you remember the biblical account?

A father’s son was possessed by a demon, causing the boy to convulse, foam at the mouth, and gnash his teeth.

Desperate, the dad asked Jesus for help. A crowd had gathered. “How long has he been like this?” Jesus asked.

“From childhood,” the father replied. “It has often thrown him into fire or water to kill him. But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.”

“If you can?” said Jesus.

(Let’s pause. Jesus knew he could. The father had gently questioned Jesus’ ability – possibly he recalled the disciples’ inability to drive out the demon – but Jesus knew he had the power. The more important question: the dad’s belief.)

Jesus continued, “Everything is possible for him who believes.”

Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” (Mark 9:21-24)

Embracing Honesty

The man’s raw honesty warms me like a bowl of chili in January. I want to hug him. I hope I’ll get the chance in heaven. But until then, I’ll settle for knowing that I’m not the only one who struggles with belief.

The type of belief I’m talking about isn’t the one-time decision of belief in Jesus as Savior and Lord of her life. This one-time decision secured the new believer’s eternal destiny: heaven. (Past tense!)

We who’ve made this decision are declared children of God. Chosen, blessed, forgiven and redeemed. You cannot do, think or say anything to cause God to love you any more. Or any less. God completely loves you.

Continually Believing

Continually believing is tough. It’s moment-by-moment belief.

Do I continually believe God will provide what I need today? Do I continually believe he is good even if one of my kids gets badly hurt? Or worse? Do I continually believe God’s Word that he hates divorce? Do I continually believe he has my best interests in mind?

What if I get cancer? Or we go bankrupt? Or my neighbor shows off her brand-new Audi while my Civic pushes 120,000 and needs a brake job? What if my Bible study sister can’t kick her drug addiction for good?

What if I can’t shake the feeling that something is wrong with me? That I’m not a good-enough mom? Or a good-enough friend? That what I do and think don’t really matter?

What if I’m afraid I can’t handle the ugly stuff of life? That I’m not strong enough?

Then God reminds me: He can. He can handle the uglies.

When I am weak, he is strong.

Oh Lord, help me overcome my unbelief. I am needy.

photo caption: http://www.flickr.com/photos/seyyed_mostafa_zamani/5771861523/

Question: Where do you struggle with unbelief? Your finances? Your job? Your family? Your health? God loves you.

Hopefully Yours,

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How to Have Mountain-Moving Faith!

By on December 5, 2012 in faith

How to Have Mountain-Moving Faith!

Imagine what would happen if you had mountain-moving faith in Jesus power.

Your arms would reach to the hurting, the poor, to HIV-positive babies. You’d accept folks who don’t look like you or smell like you or talk like you. You’d embrace the outsider, whether she wore brand-name stilettos or tattoos.

At stores and office buildings, jails and nursing homes, hospitals and orphanages, universities and kindergartens, you’d share Jesus in action.

The gates of hell would tremble. Oh yes!

I want this type of mountain-moving faith. But call me fraidy cat. Outside my safe places, I shrink. My voice thins. Over and over my mind runs the tape, “What if they reject me. . .reject me. . .reject me.”

Stop Acting Small

When you rely on yourself you act small because you are small.

Yes, when I act “in Lucy,” courage scatters like shards of broken glass. Yet “in Christ” I can access his power to do his will.

A familiar psalm proclaims, “Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Ps. 37:4

Some think this is a promise that God will give you what you want. Not so. Reread the first half of the psalm. As you delight yourself in the LORD, you will want what God wants. And whatever God purposes will come to pass. How do you delight in the Lord? Pray!

Start Acting Big

To live your mountain-moving faith, to receive the desires of your heart, you need to commune with God. This means prayer. This means talking to God and listening. This means thinking on Scripture.

3 Simple (and Fun) Prayer Ideas!

1. Pray “bookends.” When you awaken, dedicate the day to the Lord and ask him to direct you all day long. At bedtime, thank God for his direction.

2. Shoot bullet prayers. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you pray all day long. Then when he reminds you, pray.

3. Super-creative? Doodle prayers, knit prayers, dance prayers, paint prayers, ice-skate prayers.

Decide today to pray. Decide today to delight in the Lord. Decide today to have mountain-moving faith!

With Joy Overflowing!

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3 reasons to prayer-walk

By on June 19, 2012 in emotions, faith, whole health wellness

3 Reasons to Prayer-Walk!

Do you want peace? When you prayer-walk, your peace and joy WILL return. Here’s why. Here’s how.

Have you slumped through a day when everything seemed wrong? Maybe you got a pay cut, or your  computer crashed, or the pet barfed on the carpet.

When your day is crazy hard, it’s tough to feel at peace.  Here’s a solution: Prayer-walk a scripture. Simply, walk and pray with purpose.

The 3 Reasons

When you prayer-walk a scripture, at least 3 good things happen: you connect deeply with God, you get exercise, and you think on heavenly things, squelching anxiety and opening the door to peace. Prayer-walking is like it sounds. You pray, walk, and meditate on a particular scripture. The result is an amazing peace, even on bad days. Especially on bad days.

1. Connect with God

When you prayer-walk a scripture – that is, talk with God about a specific bible verse and listen to him — you readjust your priorities and put first things first. “Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you” (Matthew 6:33). Seeking the kingdom of God means desiring his rule in your life.

When you prayer-walk while focused on Psalm 23:1, you might reflect on the meaning of the phrase “I shall not want” and listen for God’s voice. In my walks while praying this verse, God has impressed on my heart the truth that he is in control and I feel comforted.

2. Move It

Walking kicks in the body’s endorphins, the feel-good neurotransmitters. When I prayer-walk — typically at a medium pace — the motion loosens tight muscles and reduces mental stress too. I prefer walking outside when possible. Breathing blue-sky air, watching squirrels scamper up maple trees, and feeling sun on my skin connects me with the magnificent creation God made.

3. Think UP

The bible tells us what to think on: heavenly things. “Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things” (Philippians 4:8). When you prayer-walk a scripture, you’ll think on heavenly things, guaranteed.

Of course, your mind may wander.

When this happens to me, I refocus on the scripture I’m praying. Since I’m prayer-walking a single scripture verse or passage, this is simple to do. I simply go back to where I left off, or begin again. You can do the same.

The Peace Payoff

Sometimes I feel out of sorts when I begin my prayer-walk. An undercurrent of anxiety has choked me so I choose Psalm 23 as my focus and picture the words as I walk.

I say, “The LORD is my Shepherd, I shall not want,” and picture a sheep slung over the shoulders of the strong, gentle shepherd. I am the sheep.

I pray something like the following: Okay, God, you know I’m sick of my minivan. It’s ten years old and banged up. I’d love the silver Audi I just passed, but you know my needs. I don’t need an Audi. I’m thankful to own a car that runs.

Now the next verse. “He makes me lie down in green pastures.” My mind’s eye sees rolling hills of lush grass and a stream. I utter these words: Oh, yes, rest! Thank you, Lord, for the reminder that I need rest and that it’s good. It’s not a luxury. I don’t have to run around like a manic squirrel, trying to do everything that people ask. I can say “No” to the book fair coordinator who called for volunteers.

Later in the Psalm it says, “You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.”

I then may pray, Not everyone is going to like me, Lord. I know that. I will have “enemies” for one reason or another. Still, I like people to like me. Am I a people-pleaser? Help me to be a God-pleaser. I trust You. You are my protector.

Do you sense the peace of  prayer-walking? Do you also sense God-confidence?

Incidentally, during inclement weather, feel free to pray scriptures in the comfort of home, preferably with dark chocolate nearby. Dark chocolate pumps endorphins too.

TOMORROW: We continue our 8-week series on Super Self Care. The topic is “Frazzled? How to Fight Fatigue.” You won’t want to miss a single post in this popular series. To get every Super Self Care post, sign up to receive my blog. Simply type in your email. A confirmation link will be sent to your inbox. Be sure to click it so you can get your blog posts.

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With Joy Overflowing!

 

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