Flip on the Weather Channel and what do I see: forest fires, hurricanes, tornadoes, storm surges, bizzards, floods and my latest “favorite”: the polar vortex that froze Florida and kept my family and kitties snuggly at home for three straight days.

These natural disasters — or “acts of God” in insurance parlance — are in truth. . .crises. Faced with the forcefulness and unpredictability of a natural disaster, we feel helpless, confused, afraid. When it gets personal — your house burns, your car slides in a ditch, your town turns to toothpicks — you may wonder if God is out to get you. Do you relate to Job’s distress?

While he was still speaking, yet another messenger came and said, “Your sons and daughters were feasting and drinking wine at the oldest brother’s house, when suddenly a mighty wind swept in from the desert and struck the four corners of the house. It collapsed on them and they are dead, and I am the only one who has escaped to tell you!” Job 1:18-21

How to Help

When a friend has questions God and natural disasters, gently remind her that the fallen nature of creation causes such disasters. If we still lived in Eden, there’d be to tornadoes or tsunamis or earthquakes.

“God isn’t causing a flood or fire or earthquake to get even with us or to punish our sinfulness,” says Timothy Thompson in Helping a Neighbor in Crisis. Real life is not a sixty-minute TV show depicting the disaster and cleanup and “We’re good.” Recovery from a natural disaster takes weeks, months, even years.

3 Ways to Help

1. Have realistic expectations and be patient.

2. Offer tangible help: medical care, clothes, housing, food, gift card for a movie. Yes, offer these in the immediate aftermath of the disaster and in months to come. Connect your friend with community resources.

3. Listen.

While the natural tendency is to give advice, don’t. . .unless she asks for it. She may need to share the sights and sounds and smells of the disaster. If you too have suffered in the disaster, a crisis counselor may be most helpful. Let expression emotion. She may speak of guilt and anger toward God, especially when the loss is great: the life of a loved one or a family home and photos.

3 Things to Avoid

1. Don’t expect her to be better in short order. Each of us has our own timeline of recovery. Hers may be slower than you like.

2. Don’t blame her for the disaster or her reaction to the disaster.

3. Don’t forget her. The aftermath of some disasters last months and years. Continue to encourage. Continue to listen. Continue to pray. Continue to show Jesus’ love in practical ways.

One simple thing: Deliver a note of encouragement and a favorite joy like home-baked cookies.

Are you facing a crisis — divorce, money problems, a serious illness, or abuse — and would like help and hope? I am a certified, seminary-trained Christian biblical counselor who counsels hope to the heart and who meets in person and by Skype. I’ve counseled women all over the U.S. as well as Canada, the U.K., Hong Kong, Australia, New Zealand, and the Philippines.

This is a link to my counseling page on my website. Please click the link and get help for you or a friend..

photo credit: ucumari via photopin cc